It does make sense

Oh these ups and downs! I could already tell this morning that I’d feel weird tonight.

Got up at 6:30 am and started the day slowly, all relaxed ๐Ÿ™‚ Then, to get an overall impression, I watched videos about fashion design portfolios (those you need to apply for an academy or uni). I felt overwhelmed because what I saw was so different to my expectations… so different to what I saw myself capable of doing! So – trap of comparison.

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Anyhow, I couldn’t see the passion in the things I do anymore. It was there once, for sure, but the question is: what is my motivation? Getting all perfectly prepared for my future and sacrificing the present? No way! But that was the case… Why am I speaking in past tenses? Because I asked my soul. It just came over me and I was in a dialogue with my soul.

“What is it that you love? I know you know it and therefore I know it deep down, but what is it? Is it something I have to experience yet?” I asked my soul.

The answer came as a feeling. Truly, I encourage you to do the same. If you really seek an answer, you’ll receive ist.

“You already do the things you love. You just can’t enjoy it anymore because you do it for a future event… not for yourself. If the future wouldn’t matter and there were no plans, how would you have spent your day? What is it that you enjoy?”

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(c)ย santigoldblog.com

And I realised… it is all there. Simply the worries about the future toke up the place of my joy. I mean it is okay to have an idea of the future… but you still live NOW and everything you do, be it meaningful or not, you should do because you enjoy it RIGHT NOW. I actually love spending my day teaching myself drawing, sewing, reading, studying, diving deep. And its so much more fun if you are fully present. Get my drift?

There was a time when i didn’t know what I loved at all. Now I know a few things. This is great. Excuse me, I’m off reading โค

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P.S.: Just realized how divinely things turn out when you don’t plan.ย Just floating. Peace xx

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This pain is not you

Night and day. Shadow and light. So beautifully complementing.

I have a truth I experienced myself that I can tell you:

that thing that annoyed you isn’t even real or important. It’s your ego that feels offended and your “pain-body” that holds onto it. After I become present again, I realize that there isn’t even a problem. Life’s still a big funny game and all is well, I can chill ๐Ÿ™‚

Eckhard Tolle describes:

The pain-body has a dormant stage and an active stage. Periodically it becomes activated, and when it does, it seeks more suffering to feed on. If you are not absolutely present, it takes over your mind and feeds on negative thinking as well as negative experiences such as drama in relationships. This is how it has been perpetuating itself throughout human history. Another way of describing the pain-body is this: the addiction to unhappiness.

Right, now that we know how unnecessary it is, how do we get rid of it?

It cannot feed on positive thoughts. When the pain-body no longer runs the internal dialogue of our compulsive thinking, we become aware of it directly. We feel the emotion in our body, and so we bring awareness to it, the light of consciousness.

Source:ย eckharttolle.com

It’s a gaaaame friends, let’s bring light into it and sunbathe with joy ๐Ÿ™‚

(Also, read “THE POWER OF NOW” o “A NEW EARTH”. Consciousness is EVERYTHING and can be learned! It changed my life ๐Ÿ™‚ )

My soul speaking

IMG_8267IMG_8271Today I spent my day making sweet-potato pancakes & yes, this is a thing and makes the purrrfect vegan and gluten free american pancakes – ย and sushi. Also with keeping up with my studies (hurry hurry ๐Ÿ˜› ) and finally going to my Ultimate frisbee training. So happy that, eventually, my feet are safe and sound again so I could give my all during the session! But the best part of the day is actually NOW and started with a single feeling, because I remembered the feeling I had when I lived in England. Not because of England but because of the freedom and “isolation” (more or less) of society and its standards. ย Of talking to a person on such a level that made me dream and believe and see the whole big thing, the universal life. Surprisingly enough, that person and me are currently missing the place we called home for 18 months. Never say never, we all know that, and it’s true. Ohh how sweet it is to enjoy life knowing that all the shit that might destroy your inner peace is just an absolute joke and the freedom you love is always around… or around the corner. It’s a feeling really and right know it has something to do with Bristol (and a person that chose/chooses to spend time with me) โค

What really matters

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Hey friends,

today Anna arrived in Leipzig to visit me, first time around since we moved back from Portugal! Of course we saw each other in between but never in Leipzig ๐Ÿ™‚ Well, I guess you can imagine how much talk must be talked after a longer period of local separation (always connected internally), as we used to talk for hours every single day back then. We had vegan pizza with my family and then started to watch Youtube videos, but then we got into deep talking again and remembered the importance of mindfulness and meditation and that, next to all the work we are both doing atm, it is utterly necessary to maintain the spiritual habits! Even if it’s hard to start sometimes… it doesn’t take more than the simple decision to sit down for some minutes and stop your mind from thinking unconsciously. We both know that spiritual growth is the foundation for happiness, success and beyond, the most perfect life in the matrix can never satisfy you as much as focusing on the basis – the deepest of it all – the universe within you!

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